


Nothing Else Matters

by i_am_a_hog



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Cheesy, Depressed Peggy, First Kiss, Fix-It, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, I'm really bad at tagging cause I only write for small fandoms where tags are near inconsequential, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Canon, Post-Canon Fix-It, Time Travel, but not too cheesy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-04 10:57:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18603121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_am_a_hog/pseuds/i_am_a_hog
Summary: !!!Post-Endgame!!!If Steve came back from his last mission to return to Bucky and a future that was entirely their own.





	Nothing Else Matters

**Author's Note:**

> Hi. It's almost 5 am and after coming home from the cinema at 1 am, I just finished this (I hope it's halfway coherent). I love Peggy with all my soul but Bucky deserves his Steve and Steve deserves his Bucky.
> 
> Enjoy!

Despite Steve’s near unlimited optimism, there had been times during the battle when he had doubted he - or anybody else for that matter - would come out alive. And so many did not. Brave warriors, fierce and loyal, died for this cause, for the freedom and liberty of the entire Earth. Steve himself would have given his life if it meant success. But in the end it had turned out to be Tony and it hurt.

The last days Steve had spent with him had reminded him that their friendship was made to last, made to outlast even a civil war or one on a much greater scale. Their relationship was made to outlast time itself. And then Tony died and just like that it was over. It seemed impossible; nothing was ever over, not really. Almost eighty years ago Steve had sacrificed his life and even then, it had not been over. He remembered the countless times when Tony had done just the same and emerged with trauma - both physical and mental - that was everlasting. But each time, he came back out alive. And as Steve remembered all this, their friendship including all their other friends, all the Avengers - new and old - he realised that only together they had been given the mere chance for this fight. Together they had pulled off the impossible: Time-travel.

When the fight itself was over, they returned to this. Steve had to place the Infinity Stones back where they belonged in space and time. He knew he was the one who had to do it. It pained him to leave his grieving friends behind. Rationally, he was aware that for them, only seconds would pass, but he was still hesitant to leave. Perhaps it was really him who needed assistance and emotional support; maybe his urge to be there for his friends – and especially for Bucky - stemmed from the need to be cared for himself.

Bucky. Steve only realised how much he had missed him, when they collapsed into each other’s arms on a battlefield soaked in blood and dust. His feelings, that had been repressed for so long all came bubbling up when he was kneeling in the dirt, arms wrapped around Bucky as if he was his only life-line. Steve knew, that his friends needed a leader, somebody to point them into a specific direction now that the greatest fight of their life was won, but in that moment he could barely muster the strength to speak - let alone lead hundreds of people to safety. But Bucky was there. For the first time in five years, Bucky was there and he was holding on to Steve just as tightly as the other way round.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled against Steve’s neck, his breath tickling the dirty, bloodied skin there, making the latter feel more alive than he had in five years despite almost dying.

“I’m so sorry,” Bucky repeated, his arms impossibly tightening around Steve. And somehow that was exactly what he needed. “Has it really been -“

“Five years,” Steve pressed out. His eyes were shut and all he really wanted was to pass out, to be allowed to be weak for once in his life. But he held on, for Bucky and for himself.

“Oh God,” Bucky whispered and Steve could only agree.

Eventually they left the battlefield and after what felt like an eternity Steve was allowed to sleep. His dreams were wild, nightmares shaking through him, making him toss around, but he never once woke for fifteen hours, as Bucky would later tell him. When he finally did wake up, he felt rested and exhausted simultaneously.

“Morning,” came from somewhere across the room. Bucky was smiling at him - a rare occurrence these days, which was why it was so refreshing to see. Steve was more awake at once.

“Breakfast has been cold for four hours, but you can just eat whatever. After all you saved the world,” he continued and added: “Again.”

Steve smiled back and slowly lifted his legs out of bed. It had been a long time since he was this sore, but even this temporary pain rang with their victory.

Steve would heal and so would the world. They had lost so much but all loss was insignificant compared to how much they had regained.

So, Steve found himself on a high-tech platform in the middle of the countryside – about as unfitting like a man seventy years out of time - about to return what was not theirs to keep. The last thing he saw before his journey was Bucky’s face, a smile gracing his features and hope shining in his eyes.

Each time-jump he performed, got easier as if his body and mind were adapting, and after his last mission was completed, Steve found himself at a loss. He had always had a purpose and suddenly, he had an open playing board at his disposal, ready to take him wherever and whenever he wanted. And with a sudden sense of overwhelming certainty, Steve knew what he had to do. There were two doses of particles left; one for his return and one in case anything went drastically wrong. A spare.

If Steve was going to use his backup, he could not mess this up, but he was not planning to; he had so much to look forward to, now that his responsibilities had finally played out after eighty years. He had a life to plan and a future with the best people he knew in his life. He had a best friend in Sam, that he would not exchange for any other friendship, and he had Bucky.

Steve could never classify Bucky merely as his friend or ever best friend anymore, because Bucky was so much more. Bucky was the one person he knew better than anybody else – and vice versa. He was the one person he trusted most and above all else, Bucky’s return had made one thing painfully clear to Steve: He was in love. After such a long time he was in love again.

Steve prepared for his last, self-assigned mission. He had chosen the time perfectly, knew he had a lot of explaining to do.

When Peggy opened the door, she clasped a hand over her mouth. It was the first time, Steve had seen her cry. She was wearing a shaggy over-sized shirt and dirty slippers. As far as Steve could tell, she had no trousers on and her hair was nowhere as neatly styled as he was used to seeing on her. But nonetheless, she was still beautiful and Steve remembered why he had fallen madly in love with her.

“Steve?” she managed to get out between sobs and all he could do was open his arms.

“I’m okay,” he said. “It’s okay. You’re okay. Everything is gonna be okay,” Steve chanted and Peggy nodded against his chest, while her tears kept flowing.

Eventually, they sat down and he began to explain; Peggy listened.

“We did it.”

“I never doubted you,” she replied and smiled up at him. It would have been the perfect opportunity to kiss her, but Steve suddenly remembered another smile, another pair of eyes - blue, not brown - gleaming in the sunlight that shone through tree-tops in the distant future. He remembered lips, that he knew, framed by a beard on a face he would recognise among billions in an instant and he realised that he wanted to kiss those lips and none other. So instead of doing what he would have done for the past eighty years, Steve merely smiled back.

“Thank you.”

Peggy sighed and Steve knew, he had to tell her now.

“I didn’t come to stay. I’m sorry. I just wanted to let you know I’m alive and well… given the circumstances; I wanted to reassure you and tell you how much I missed you. And how much I - I care for you.”

Peggy nodded.

“You have to go back. This is not your time anymore.”

She sat up and took one of Steve’s hands between her own.

“I love you, Steve and nothing is ever going to change that, but the nature of our feelings can change. And we change as well. I understand.”

This moment, when Peggy looked at him from red-rimmed eyes, salty tear-tracks visible along her cheeks, but completely earnest and rational, was the second time Steve remembered why he had fallen in love with her once upon a time.

“Thank you,” he repeated. “I love you too.”

In her eyes he saw only understanding.

“And one more thing.”

Peggy raised her eyebrows in anticipation.

“I believe I owe you a dance.”

Her grin could light up the world and Steve would exchange this moment for none other, knowing that she forgave him, knowing that she could move on now; it was what he had always wanted. He had wanted to be with her.

Yet, now that he held her, this woman, still only half-dressed and in the most hideous yellow slippers he had ever seen, Steve suddenly knew he had really changed.

‘It’s been a long time’ the song was called and Steve had laughed when Peggy told him. The irony of it all was just too perfect.

“It’s been a long time,” he whispered into her hair now, ignoring the fact that she clearly had not washed it for several days. “It’s been a long time since I was happy.”

Peggy smiled. He did not see her face, but Steve knew.

“It’s him, right?” she asked. Perceptive as ever. “Your friend. Your Bucky, right?”

Steve’s heart jumped at her words and he knew them to be true. At once, he realised why of all things to say, he had chosen “Bucky is alive,” to reveal himself to his younger self. Because Bucky was the most important thing and for Bucky, Steve would give up anything.

“Yeah,” he sighed.

“Does he know?”

“No,” Steve admitted and he heard Peggy take a breath, but he corrected himself before she got a chance to criticise him. “Not yet. I need to go back. This has been there for a long time and I only just realised it myself. And the thing is: I really don’t know how we’re both still alive. It’s so unlikely, that we got through everything time and time again, so the fact that we did and we’re still kicking has to count for something, right?”

“Yeah,” Peggy said softly.

“What if he doesn’t feel that way?” Steve said more to himself than anything else.

“He will. I’m sure of that.”

Steve did not dare question her convictions.

Their goodbyes were heartfelt and sincere, but this time they had closure and that was really, why Steve had come here.

He went on his last time-jump with a feeling of slight nostalgia, but leaving this method of travel behind himself would be for the best. And when he rematerialised back on the platform in the woods and saw Bruce, Sam and Bucky staring at him, Steve knew, he had come home. There was barely a second of silence, before Bruce and Sam started talking simultaneously, and within another moment, Steve found himself wrapped in Sam’s arms.

“God, I really thought, we’d lost you,” he yelled and Steve just grinned.

“You know me, Sam. You won’t lose me.”

Steve gave him a pat on the back when their hug broke apart.

“You were like two seconds late, man. We thought you wouldn’t show,” he said, even while Steve was already getting smothered in a Hulk-sized hug.

Only Bucky had not moved, Steve noticed, when he was breathing normally again. He was still standing there, a slight smile on his lips, eyes trained on Steve, but did not move.

Steve stepped down to him.

“We need to talk.”

They made their way back to the hotel suite they had rented, in near silence. The second Bucky unlocked the door, he began to speak.

“You went back, didn’t you?”

Steve knew what he meant.

“How did you know?”

Bucky looked at him in disbelief.

“Your emergency particles were gone. And if there had been an incident, you’d have told us. Remember I was an assassin. I notice the details.”

“Yeah, I went back,” Steve sighed and got himself a glass of water.

“How was she?” Bucky asked. Steve was not sure why he was so interested. He had never really been in close contact with Peggy after all.

“A mess, honestly,” Steve answered and drank up his water. “She was not coping well, but we’ve had our goodbyes now and she’ll move on.”

“So you won’t go back?” Bucky asked and this time it was Steve’s turn to look confused.

“Why should I?”

“Because it’s all you ever wanted.” Bucky was looking out of a window; his voice sounded different. Held back in a way.

And it was not like Bucky was wrong exactly. After all, how would he know?

Steve set his glass down on the counter and walked over to join Bucky.

“Not anymore,” he admitted. There was no obvious reaction, but Bucky also did not signal any discomfort, so Steve continued.

“For the longest time it was, but I’ve changed. I went back and we talked and we’re just not the same. I mean she is, but I’m not, Buck.”

Steve ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

“I’ve changed. Life in this century has changed me and distanced me from back then. Especially the last five years. It was hard.”

Bucky nodded faintly, still resolutely staring out the window.

“That’s why we wouldn’t fit together anymore. I love her. And I always will, but it’s not the same. Because I realised something else.”

‘What if he doesn’t feel that way?’ his own voice echoed within Steve’s mind and anxiety flooded through him, but then he remembered the answer.

‘He will. I’m sure of that.’

Steve sent one last prayer of gratitude to Peggy before he took a deep breath and reached for Bucky’s metal hand.

Immediately, the latter turned to face Steve. He was still not quite used to Bucky being shorter than him, but Steve was sure that this would change.

“What did you realise, Stevie?” Bucky asked.

And in this moment, it all came crashing down onto Steve: every memory he had of Bucky, in blinding detail, through the decades now mounting up to nearly a century, the good, the bad, and the horrifying. And with those memories came the realisation that had been missing up until then.

Bucky would fit him, because Bucky had been there for everything. Bucky had gone through the same, only exponentially worse, so if he was going to let Steve in, they would fit together.

“I don’t need her. I only need you.”

Bucky looked up at him and smiled, but his eyes were still sad, full of doubt.

“I don’t know...” he started, but drifted off and looked away.

“But I do,” Steve replied, his voice steady and sure. Slowly, so as not to startle Bucky, he lifted the hand up to his lips and planted a kiss onto the first knuckle, feeling the cold metal underneath his lips, another on the second, his eyes staying on Bucky’s face. And when he finally looked back at Steve, there were so many emotions in his eyes, that Steve felt like he was drowning; there were still traces of sadness and doubt, but also devotion, admiration and love.

“I have never been so sure about anything. You’re the one person I know best and even though I only just now realised how much you really mean to me, you have to know. You need to see that I mean it. I looked up to you for so long - I still do - because you’re magnificent, every aspect of you.” Steve pressed one last kiss to the back of Bucky’s hand.

“God, Steve,” Bucky breathed out and Steve knew exactly what he was trying to say.

“Yeah. We’ve come a long way -“

Before he could finish his sentence, Bucky moved. He pulled his hand from Steve’s grip and took a firm hold of Steve’s waist instead, pulling them closer together. His other came up against the side of Steve’s face.

Bucky’s features were blurry, so close to Steve, but he refused to close his eyes just yet.

“I’m gonna kiss you now, ‘cause I’ve wanted that for too long,” Bucky mumbled, the words’ breath warm on Steve’s lips. And when Bucky leaned in and Steve finally closed his eyes, bringing a hand up to drive his fingers into Bucky’s hair, his whole life seemed to centre in on this one kiss.

It was an insecure kiss, as first kisses tended to be, but they soon found their rhythm and when Bucky tilted his head and opened his lips, Steve reacted instinctively to return the kiss just as eagerly.

When they eventually broke apart, both of them were breathing heavily, while holding the other close, not quite ready to let go.

“We should definitely have done this sooner,” Steve spoke into the silence and Bucky downright giggled. It was a sound so infectious and rarely heard from him, that Steve broke out into laughter as well. And just like that, all the pent up nervousness and anxiety, Steve had held inside of himself about this moment, was lifted off his shoulders. Never had he felt more relieved.

Gently taking Bucky’s face between his hands, he returned to kissing him; soft, chaste kisses at first, but then Bucky began to chase after Steve’s lips, but sooner than he would have liked, Steve had to pull back again.

“I should take a shower. I will be back and we’ll definitely continue this, but I need to get out of the suit before I can’t stop myself anymore. Or you for that matter.” He motioned towards the time-travel suit he was still wearing.

“Looks good on you, though.” Bucky grinned at him. “Then again, anything does,” he added. “Now get out of here before I use my shiny Wakandan arm to keep you here forever.”

Steve grinned back at him and hurried for the most enthusiastically quick shower in his entire life.

When he stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in just sweatpants and a t-shirt, a song was playing on the stereo of their room. Bucky had changed as well, was wearing a sweatshirt and had tied back his hair.

“A dance?” he asked, hand outstretched and Steve took it without hesitation. For the second time in one day and the second time in two different centuries, he stepped closer to a person he loved.

 _So close, no matter how far_ , the song started and it all began to make sense.

They were slowly moving to the music and Steve could not keep his eyes off Bucky’s face.

_Never opened myself this way_

_Life is ours, we live it our way_

“Why this song?” Steve asked quietly, even though he knew the answer.

_Trust I seek and I find in you_

Bucky lightly kissed the corner of his mouth.

_Open mind for a different view_

He gently ran his hand down Steve’s back and pulled him even closer.

_Never cared for what they do_

_Never cared for what they know_

Their kiss was slow and deep and Steve noticed that it was different from kisses he had shared with anybody else before - not only because there was a beard rubbing against his skin. No, Bucky was really his, fitting into Steve’s indents like a completed jigsaw puzzle, moving at the same pace, feeling the same way, and putting it all into this one kiss.

“I love you,” Steve mumbled against Bucky’s lips and without missing a beat, Bucky’s response was perfectly timed.

“ _And nothing else matters._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :) I hope you liked it, because it's literally all I have to say. Otherwise, I'm speechless.
> 
> If you did like it, I always love kudos and especially comments to keep me nourished <3


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